Symbols Part Three: The Ankh

Ankh literally means 'life'. All life. Earthly, spiritual and even underworldly. It is an ancient Egyptian symbol that is so old, many scholars are not sure of when or where it came from. Whether from a the shape of a sandal strap or that it is the rising sun, the loop being the sun, the horizontal bar the horizon and the vertical bar the sun's path, or even the Nile.

On walls of tombs, many gods are depicted feeding pharaohs an ankh, giving it the sub meaning, 'breath of life'. It is also said to be a gateway between this realm and to the Underworld. It unifies the male and female, through the loop (Sun, which is masculine) and horizontal bar (Earth, which is feminine), or through the cross being male and the loop being female. Mirrors, which are also doors to the otherside, were made in the shape of an ankh.

Symbols Part Two: The Caduceus

The Caduceus is a rod or staff with a knobbed top, a pair of sprouted wings and two serpents weaved around the staff. It is often mistaken with the rod of Asclepius, a staff with a single serpent wrapped around it representing Asclepius, Greek god of medicine and healing and son of Apollo. Because of this, the Caduceus is used in the medical and pharmaceutical fields. But it represents Hermes, the Messenger God and a patron of travelers, merchants and thieves.

There are stories behind the Caduceus. The one story is where Hermes stole some of Apollo's sacred cattle. To appease for what he did, Hermes fashioned a lyre. Apollo, in awe of the lyre, traded Hermes his staff. Another is one where Hermes had found two intertwined snakes, battling each other. He took his staff and drove in between the two snakes and brought peace between them.

Through the months in preparation on my tattoo, in which is now the Caduceus on my back, I did research in finding the meaning of this symbol has it has popped up a few times  in meditations, along with the Ankh and the Blood (or Knot) of Isis. During that time I also broke down the Caduceus into the parts that make up it.

Symbols Part One: The Goal

Been feeling like I have no idea what to write here anymore. I forgot how sometimes sharing can be the hardest thing for me. Communication has always been difficult for me.

But then last night I thought of doing a series of posts that goes through different symbols in Paganism as well as other religions and spiritual paths and describing their meanings, and then meditate on the meaning of the symbol to me and post my findings.

Tomorrow I will start with the Caduceus.

I hope this will help me some up with other thing to write about.

Self Love

I was told once by a woman, a customer of mine, how she felt so much better once she took Jesus into her heart. This made me think. Who is Jesus really? He is different for every person. To me, Jesus was a good man with the right type of thinking, with followers who had the wrong idea for the right reasons. Over time, those reasons became obscure and became power and control. That is just how I believe on this matter. Why would any religion be so keen on a non-believer to convert?

I think in a manner of way I to carry Jesus in my heart. Or at least try to. I just refer him to love. Isn't that what he was supposed to be about? Love? Now I'm not just talking about romantic or familiar or even through friendship. I think it mostly pertains to self love. Self acceptance. Because let's face it, do you really love yourself? Completely and unconditionally?

I know I don't completely. But I want to and I'm trying to. To love yourself is more difficult than to love another in my opinion. I love my family. I love my friends. But I still don't love myself completely.

I also remember a story of his I heard at a bible study group back when I was a teenager still trying to find my path. It was a story about how three were given gold. The first spent it all. The second buried it, and the third invested it. Only the third got more out of his gold than the first two brothers. It's a story about gifts and how we should share them with others and the world.

People say that singing is my gift. But that is difficult for me to share, but not at the same time. Sometimes I'm too shy and sometimes I'm searching for acceptance. Again, loving myself comes into play with that.

I guess everything comes down to love, which in my belief is the Divine. Unconditional love.

De"man"ing the Creeper

So yesterday my roomie took her kitten, Creeper is his name (from "There is a kitten on your butt!"), to get fixed, or as she calls it "his balls getting chopped off". This morning we left at about 6:45 to take a 20 minute drive down to the clinic to pick him up.

Well I had to go down south on the interstate, and I knew that, but apparently my brain had other plans and instead of taking the belt east to get to the interstate, I went west. I thought of turning around, but since my he navigation program on my phone just told me to keep going for a couple of miles I went ahead. I figured, what the hell? I'll go this way.

An Epiphany of Enlightenment

A moment of being. An epiphany. My mother calls it an "Ah ha!" moment. Whatever term you use or make up, those moments have helped me see the world, or myself, in a different view. Many of which happened in my more recent years. Such as a moment at one of my great uncles' funeral, where I learned the connection of death between us all and how it is only just the last great journey in our short lives. With such a short time to fill that indiscriminate void in our hearts and souls, a women came to me about Jesus, giving me another epiphany. She said that Jesus was inside her. I remember thinking that I had found "Jesus," though I use a different term. Gaia. Earth. Be it God, Allah, Jesus, Mother Earth or even the "Force," to me those terms were all synonyms to each other. But the one moment of being that pops most in my head was when I was much younger.

My Digital Crack

Sorry, been preoccupied with my 'crack', City of Heroes. It's a multi mass online role play game, aka MMORPG. It's super hero themed. I like it. I can play a hero, a villain, or something in between.


And yes, I called it my crack.


City of Heroes, or mmos in general are an addiction for me. It mostly was World of Warcraft (WoW), which some of you might actually have heard of it. Then I found City of Heroes (CoH). I used to play both of them at one point, but soon had to quit one and just play the other because I can't afford paying for both of them.


For a while there it was just WoW. Got my main up to the highest level. Then got tired of it really fast. I don't like doing the same thing everyday. I like variety. And it was hard to play with my friends because they were doing what I was bored of. So I switch back to CoH, because in CoH, I can feed my ADD tendencies where I make a new type of character that I haven't played before. In WoW, you have only so many classes, which are limited by race, and there 14 to chose from, seven on each faction.


Now with CoH, There may be less options on archetypes (class) or origins (race), but after you chose those, you have numerous power combinations. And after that, your missions vary depending on what you are doing or who you chose as a contact.  In WoW, almost ALL quests (missions) are available to all in the faction.


Sorry that thise probably goes way over your head, and sorry I haven't been posting anything. I kinda let two days pass by rather quickly thanks to CoH. ^^; I tend to write my posts at night and put them on a scheduled post, but the past couple of nights I've been WAY too tired to do anything.


If you do play City of Heroes, or want interested in it, let me know.